Adulthood Needles

Sometimes I wish reality could be like disneyland, a playground so to speak. Going through adulthood is excruciating. Immense mental pain that could lead to physical pain like lethargy. Yes. I have been going through this 'lethargy' phase ever since adulthood i.e. 4 months and 21 days. Still wandering at the beginning stage of 'adulthood' in massive 'adulthood' pain. Just in case if you are wondering why such fuss about adulthood where most of you would generally succumb to the idea of 'that's life, just move on' and 'you are just growing older but you are still who you are', well to me, it's not just that easy. Maybe to most of you (to many of my friends out there) accepting adulthood like peanuts. I beg to differ but it's just not working well for me. It's like attending Chemistry tuition back in the old days where I do not even understand the subject very well at all. Like adulthood clearly. 

I had an epiphany few days ago or maybe last night, whatever it is, I had a sign - the calling, the clue OR the message:

o·blig·a·to·ry   [ɒˈblɪgətərɪ -trɪ]

No matter what, there's no escape from it. It is God's mandatory task that everyone has to go through. I just need to learn to accept things naturally and change. Maybe adulthood is about changing or it is about change and acceptance of things in life. I do like the idea of change but certain things like art, tunes and style. Attitude wise, I'll check it later. My mum keeps on telling me that I have some issues with time. In fact, I do get that a lot from my friends and it certainly doesn't look dainty. Okay, I admit I am quite a hustler when it comes to time but obviously it always takes me out. Many of you might find this weird but I think I have developed a condition being afraid of time. According to Dr. Pamela Lee, the condition I'm having is called chronophobia i.e. the fear of time.

'Chronophobia is especially common in prison inmates and the elderly, but it can manifest in any person who has an extreme amounts of stress and anxiety in their life', (Pamela, wikipedia).

There is a cure though which is refraining from wearing watches and looking at clocks. I have not been wearing my watch for about a week already and I gotta admit misplacing my watch might slightly contribute to my recent change.

Anyway, moving on to the matter. I think I have to embrace adulthood  like enduring 0.1mm needle pieced through my flesh and bones. If I can take that, adulthood bring it on!